Tuesday, November 28, 2006

What was I thinking?

I didn't get that job I talked about earlier. It was a dream come true job. At Park Road Post which is the post production facility that was set up by Peter Jackson. It's one of a kind all-in-one business - they have studios, stages, sound production, film developing, telecine, weta digital next door, in-house cinema with pre-release showings to the staff, staff discount cafe on site, gym, three furnished apartments for visiting directors or if you are working late.

It was a very fast hire. An ad came through, I applied at 6pm, they rang me 9am the next day, two days later I had an interview, three days after that I had a second interview. I was so certain I was going to get it. I needed to get it. It was the career start with capital letters.

Sure, there were going to be sacrifices - I live in Karori, it's in Miramar, they wanted 7.30am starts. I was going to be getting up 5.30am every day to get there by the start time, and was already looking at trademe rentals to move to Miramar with my first paycheck. I was ready to do all that.

Oh, suppose I should say what the job is. Chemist. Making sure all those bleach, fixer, developer solutions were of correct concentrations, consistent throughout the shooting of the film, troubleshooting problems that film operators might encounter. Quite a large lab and sole charge. All standardised with Kodak ImageCare.

Really, it was fantastic dream job, no matter the sacrifices. I don't even know what the pay was going to be, it doesn't even matter.

The HR lady said it came so very very close between me and one other applicant. But apparently he pulled out an unexpected surprise of having had film experience. That sealed the deal I guess. She said she'd like to keep my CV on file and to call me in a few months when something else comes up.

Sure, that sounds hopeful, but who's going to pay my bills next month, and how am I going to afford Christmas? I had so many people cheering, well-wishing, praying for me. Many people driving me, lending me clothes for the interview, offering interview tips and answering my questions. I feel like I've let them all down somehow. Not just because of this job, but just overall - three years of a degree, so much support all around, and I have nothing to show for it. My flatmates are working as a house painter, check out operator and shoe salesperson. I want to be able to utilise my degree.

Maybe it was all a silly idea from 2004, maybe I should have stayed in IT. I've run out of science jobs now, applied for everything there was, and the ads have dried up. I'm applying for IT jobs, and they want to know how I explain the last three years. Not here nor there now. Will probably be working in a supermarket next month. What was I thinking?


Brad said...

Ouch, I'm sorry to hear you didn't get the job.. I can only imagine how gutting that would be :( In fact I found your blog through Google as my 'dream come true' job is at the place next door, heh.

Keep at it though, I'm sure you'll find a job doing something you love soon enough :D

Matt said...

I'm sure you'll find a job you love doing. Sounds promising that they've asked to call you back in a while - that's what happened where I'm working now. My interview turned out to be little more than a formality XD

Hope all goes well, and while you might be the only person you know without a job, no one else seems to actually have jobs in their field (or at least, not as far as I can tell from your blogs), so it's not like you're behind them all at all.

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All the best with your next dream job!