Sunday, December 19, 2004


Yesterday went to Uni to enrol properly. Had to drop German because I have so many other papers to do. One of the biomed papers clashed with chemistry paper, and the professor let me take the next 3rd year paper instead. I feel "thpethial".
Went to the movies with the boys. Watched Saw. Pretty good.

Today is a month since I've come back from Germany. Been feeling a bit flat and uninspired.

Annoys me to write about feelings. When I browse random blogs, there are so many whiney writers that go on about their hurt feelings and nobody loves them and woe is them. I mean, really! - so shit happens, get over it.

Easier said than done I suppose - your biggest enemy is your own mind. I could convince myself of any crazy odd thing in the matter of minutes. Unconvincing is harder.

Not caring is the hardest. I can do hating, I can do loving, I can even sometimes manage both at the same time with polka dots on the side. But not caring is a bitch. I am very good at showing the not caring now. But when the darkness comes and all the entertainment options have exhausted themselves for the night, all I want is that person to hold.

I've perfected the not talking, not emailing, not icqing, not sobbing. I show perfect nothing. I have a constant metallic taste in my mouth. The taste of lying to myself.

But what can you do. You can't make someone else change their mind. I was never good at sales. Especially outbound.

Meh, I've become the whiney writer I so dispise. I want to be funny and sarcastic, a bit cynical and comical. Instead I sound bitter and empty.

Got my copy of WoW today, the fun won't stop now.

In the 14th episode of Angel season 5, Angel gets turned into a puppet. Who am I to complain about anything? Incidentally, he also gets a date in the same episode. Go figure.

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